THEY CAME FOR CHEAT DAY!

Pie in the Park

OOOOOH BOY Cheaters! What a fantastically fun filled entry do I have for you this week! I had my very first Cheat Day. Don't Care. fans/friends make a trip ALL THE WAY to Chicago from Virginia JUST to experience Cheat Day with me! Well...not really JUST for that, they also wanted to catch a concert that wasn't coming to the east coast and they've never been here before and they wanted to check it out and well...SHUT UP! A boy can dream can't he?! THEY CAME FOR CHEAT DAY!

Chooch Chat

Stephen Kolberg and Jennifer Lamendola were my college roommates and now they are married. It's been a long time since we've seen each other and a WAY longer time since we've actually hung out so the whole thing has been a serious treat for me as well. They landed at my placed on Cheat Morning at around 10:30AM. We waited around a bit for Liz to be ready to GET THIS CHEAT DAY GOING!

We started at my NEW SPOT OF THE WEEK! I have been to Bang Bang Pie and Biscuits a few times just for fun and before this diet and it was always delectable. Before getting in to the vastness of this flavor country I want to take it down a notch or two. It's simply cramped. That is totally not unheard of in this town as it IS a city and it has to fit many buildings into each block so some joints open up into locations that are just a bit too small for the eventual boom in business. Otherwise Bang Bang, GOOD SHOW! Also, special shout out to my home boy Trevor! It's always great to see you bud, sorry it doesn't happen too often!

I ATE a Buffalo Chicken Pot Pie for my meal. The others got a sausage biscuit with cheddar cheese and a seasonal jam, and biscuits and gravy with sausage and egg. I got to try it all and it was all glorious. I loved the pot pie, though it was a bit too blue cheesy for my taste. If you love blue cheese EAT DAT SHIT MOTHER FUGGLER! The biscuits were amazing.

NOW LET'S TALK PIE! We got three slices to split between 4 people. We got their Honey Pie (baked honey custard, blueberry compote, graham crust), Black and Blue Pie (blackberries, blueberries, orange brown sugar crumble, leaf lard pastry crust) and Chocolate Puddin' Pie (chocolate pudding, whipped cream, graham crust). MY FAVORITE?! The chocolate puddin' pie. However, I think the consensus was pretty split across the board.

MOVING ON! There were a few grumbling about not eating enough of this or not eating enough of that, but I gotta tell you, that first meat packed quite a punch and these two SKINNY PUNKS had a long way to go with Ol'ZACH at the helm. I'm not saying I paced myself for their sake necessarily because I am trying to get into the habit of pacing myself in general. BUT, you listen to what we ate the rest of the day and YOU TELL ME!

We didn't eat for quite a while after that, but we did stop to meet Cheat Day Pal, Soup (sorry I never drank that Malort your Cheat Day requests are reinstated), at Hopleaf for some brews. I had 2 Zombiedusts from Three Floyds and 2 Double Daisy Cutters from Half Acre. I REALLY enjoyed those Double Daisy Cutters, espcially for 8%ers.

Next, BOOM Jet's Pizza. The three of us split a small, two each ya tallywackers! Guess what, THEY FUCKING LOVED IT. Because who FRIGGIN doesn't?! NO ONE that's who! YOU TWATS! GO. TO. JET'S. PIZZA! We had a Hawaiian with jalapeno.

Almost immediately from there we went to (ANOTHER NEW PLACE) Big Star so we could slam a pitcher of margaritas and two TACOS each. It was a day of twos and and it was about the perfect amount! I ate a Taco De Panza (crispy braised pork belly, tomato guajillo sauce, queso fresco, onion, cilantro) and a Taco Al Pastor (marinated spit roasted pork shoulder, grilled pineapple, grilled onion, cilantro). I gotta tell ya, I like them, they were priced fairly I thought for as big this restaurant is, but I've had MUCH better tacos in a city that is just jammed packed with delicious and authentic Mexican food.

A post-Big Star mini-bar crawl ensued. We did a shot and a beer at G-Man Tavern, then a shot and a beer at Ten Cat where we eventually met up with Liz. Once Liz arrived I had several more beers. (Mostly PBRs across the board Alex, sorry it was nothing fancy).

Now, I'm gonna let ya'll guess what happens next!

Cheat Day carried over a bit into the next day when we ate at Ramen Wasabi and then made a rather LATE NIGHT Taco Bell Cantina run. Thanks for visiting Stephen and Jennifer. You know how I know we are great friends who made a connection that will last the rest of our lives? Our hanging out never skipped a god damn beat. It was almost like we were back in college again (most of the time anyway). We made the same old jokes, new jokes of the same style, new jokes of a DIFFERENT style and talked about all sorts of people we used to know and still know! We also talked about real shit about being grown up and the way things change and how to cope.

Take care of yourselves. If you do it'll better prepare you to take care of each other. And always eat like your life depended on it.

ELE,
Zach Finch

Dinner Diner

In Place of Stephen eating, a Slinger

Eat It Up

Freaky Cheat Day

OH MY GOD Cheatsters! What a wild Cheat Day this past week. Before I get into the crazy stuff let me just tell you that I gained only ONE pound since the 4th of July and the wild Florida week and I think that's actually pretty gaul dern GOOD, kay?! So if you're like pissed or whatever you can just effing SHOVE IT!

Also, If this is your first time reading EVER or even in a while go back and read a few posts and you'll know what the hell I have been up to and why I'm not mad about gaining a pound on the slow carb diet.

I need to give a quick shout out to Soup, Maureen M., Super Bowl Champ Alex R., and as usual the loveliest lovely Liz C. for a mid week cook out on the beach. Alex R. was, rightfully, busting my balls because I was enjoying a few midweek beers during the cook out. I want to point out once more to him and EVERYONE that I stuck to JUST meat and veggies for vittles this cook out alright?! My cookout meal was a burger patty, a sausage, some try-colored bell peppers and humus. SO YEAH, I had a few midweek beers alright?! SUE ME!

I also need to shout out at the top to the Jackies, Sater, Summer James, Adam, and the Loveliest Liz AGAIN! Cause we went to Dinner Diner after the Friday night Man Called Noon show where I ate a slinger and 7/8ths of a double bacon cheeseburger. It WAS after midnight though, so... FUCK IT, it counts as Cheat Day.

I awoke Cheat Day morn' knowing I had a fairly busy day ahead of me. I had to go to my final Annoyance class with Ryan A., I then had an audition across town for the Plagiarists next theatrical season, THEN I had to walk Rob Face and Erin "Sandra Bullock" C.'s lil' baby pup Barkley. Quite a busy Cheat Day...a little TOO busy for my taste, but I went on my way. For first bites I went back to the Budlong with the Lovely Liz and friends Jaq Attack and Drew "You Simply Must" J. for a lil'fried Chicken brunch. If you're a fan of the blog you know the Budlong, a fantastic little Nashville Hot style fried chicken joint with multiple Chicago locations. Our local one is in Lincoln Square and it is delightful.  I ordered the Hot tenders, a side of mac and cheese, and a cheerwine. A solid meal to start a cheat day for sure...BUT THEN!

Barkley

I went to class and I was expecting a quick lunch with teacher and friend Ryan A. but it had to be postponed. So, instead I got a black iced coffee from Starbucks (A Non-Cheat Day treat) and went to my audition early. I CRUSHED the audition thanks to Liz's and Ryan's help and then went over to Hambone and Summer James' crib (aka The Sing What You Say Place) which was close by the audition AS WELL AS the sweet puppy Barkley whom I'd have to be walking soon. I was met with a PBR (a delightful cheat-y beverage) and we began talking about what we'd be eating for Cheat Day Dinner! You see people love being around on Cheat Day because they get to go on a fantastical Cheat Day adventure with yours truly, so we began to plan.

We decided it'd be good to hit the beach for a bit before the dog walk and before it got dark. So Hambone slid me a special brownie (A delightful Cheat Treat) and assured me it wouldn't launch me to far out there maaaan. So we also rounded up some vodka and some vitamin waters (A Non-Cheat Day Treat...) went to the beach, threw around a frisbee, ran into some good ol'friends (shout out Tommy C. and Sophie B.!) then drank some vodka drinks. I went to walk the dog and the plan was to reconvene at The Sing What You Say Place and get SERIOUS about CHEATING on something new for your sweet eyeballs to take in and your bellies to YERN for!...but then...

Steve Leme in Beerfest

The edible started hitting me REAL good, really not too much, honestly just right. I was feeling social and good and happy and ready to EAT! I got back to The Sing What You Say Place to figure it out and Summer James DEMANDED that we all take what he called a "Bloody Skull." I first learned of something similar to this in the movie "Beerfest" in which they call it a "strikeout." Summer James' version simply was to take a hit out of a bowl (inhale only) and then we would each take a shot of whiskey (cheat day treat) then exhale the hit. "Sure why not!" I said! "CHEAT DAY!" we Cheered!

From that moment on I was no longer the Zach you all know and love. I was indeed out of this world. I was giggly and squirmy and paranoid, I could NOT organize my thoughts properly nor did I have the ability to rally a bunch of drunk and high people to go get some delicious Cheat Day fare from a place we'd never been before!

THEN, out of nowhere! A young family shows up to the Sing What You Say Place...with CHILDREN ages 2 and 5. Now, I bet some of you read this and probably think to yourselves, "geez Zach I'm not sure you should be around children completely sober even!" And first of all FUCK YOU, but you aren't wrong, I've got a mouth on me and not much of a filter, but I am also surprisingly good with kids so take that opinion and shove it!

That being said, I really didn't have any business being around kids in this case. I was gone! I was drunk off vodka and a shot of whiskey and high off of a brownie and a solid hit from a bowl that had me coughing hard when a shot divided what should be a normal inhale/exhale. On top of that I was HANGRY as a mother fucker because all I had on Cheat Day so far was 3 chicken tenders, Texas Toast, half a thing of Mac and Cheese, and a pot brownie.

"WOW Zach, I'm sure you were FUCKED! What'd you do?!"

I hid...I hid in Summer James' bathroom until the family was gone. When I emerged Summer James pointed out that I had no business going out in public to eat if I had to hide from children...so...we ordered Jet's Pizza...so...sorry not sorry. ALWAYS JET'S! We got two larges for four people. One was chicken bacon mushroom green pepper on Cajun Crust (delightful) and one was pineapple jalapeno and pepperoni on TURBO CRUST. WOOO! If you haven't had Jet's yet, you're fucking up!

After I ate I was feeling much better and I had an early morning the next day so I had to head home. On my way home I stopped at Lindo Guadalajara to get a plate of chorizo nachos to-go that I split with the loveliest Liz when I got home. So I made up some lost Cheat Day ground that way.

WOOO! What a wild one, right everyone?! I guess my Cheat Day this time was more party based than new food based! I'm glad everyone is okay though. I want to hand it to Summer James, Hambone and the previously unmentioned Santiago for taking care of me! Just like I tell all of you each week. Take care of each other! Take care of yourselves. Eat like your life depended on it!

ELE,
Zach

"Spoken" for by a "Big and Little" Keg Party this Cheat Day!

Happy America week you fuckin' cheatin' ass cheater eaters!

"WOAH HO HO DUDE! Comin' on REAL strong this week, don't ya think?"

HEY! If you don't like it this is gonna be a LONG post for you sexy cheats, beCAUSE this week for Cheat Day, I went to a KEG PARTY!!!! WOOOOO! Thanks Alex Romero and Andrew Campbell of Make It Up Media fame for getting me out to a Keg Party benefit jawn called Lemon Jeese to benefit PAWS Chicago, an Animal Rights org! BUT, I'm getting ahead of myself. Don't praise me for my selfless act of saving countless animals' lives one beer at a time just yet, because I've got some Cheat Day debauchery to report.

I awoke a little late because I had a REAL late night the night before (if you want to know more about that you're going to have to PM me) but I weighed in at my lowest weight yet, 243lbs! Which felt real good after I gained a little weight back from those vacations I was going on. Liz and I slowly and groggily got ourselves together and headed down to the local and lovely bagel cafe, Spoken, where I get...wait for it...a vegetarian sandwich!

"Did you just say vegetarian mawkfler?"

Liz's Sammy (also good)

YEAH man, chill. It was god damn delicious and it came on a PIZZA BIALY! The sandwich is called the Caldera, named after what it will leave after it is eaten. (Look it up and you might laugh). The sandwich has provolone, artichoke hearts, kalmata olives, and basil pesto. I also think I need to mention PIZZA BIALY again! I had to look up what a bialy was, it's a certain kind of flat-ish bagel and when there's pizza on a bagel it doesn't fucking matter whether or not there's meat it's gonna be fucking TASTY! Go get one, I dare you! Besides, I can eat meat any day of the week.

I then had to go to improv where I didn't eat anything so...MOVING ON! When I got out I went to record an episode of Chooch Chat with Anthony Giamichael, Mike Hamilton, and Mike Sater. It was mostly about the world cup. Also, before and during the podcast I ate peanut butter stuffed pretzel bites, golden berries, a delicious soft cheese atop cut bell peppers, vodka lemonade drinks, and of course BEERS (my old favorite Miller High Life to be exact).

I then went to my NEW SPOT OF THE WEEK to meet Liz for a Linner meal between her performances of Buddy-The Buddy Holly Story at Stage 773. The spot? Big and Little's on Belmont. Big and Little's is known for their fish tacos and has developed into a small chain over the last few years. They are a very popular dinner food spot in the city and they certainly do good everything.

I got the Al Pastor burger. Why?! Because you NUMBSKULLS they put FRIED pork belly up on that! Did you forget that I'm talkin' bout MAWfcklin' CHEAT DAY!? GOD. They also got American Swiss (the blondest of all the cheeses), pickled jalapeno, GRILLED PINEAPPLE, and "special sauce" (which I'm still convinced could be orange jizz). I also got me some cajun fries which are always a nice touch.

I'm gonna be honest with you here folks, this burger was easily the best item I have eaten off of the Big and Little's menu. I have been underwhelmed by them in the past. Granted, I'm not a fish or fish taco type of guy, though I AM a taco kind of guy so I think I'm just going to have to taco it up there in the future to continue to delve into what supposedly makes them so well liked on the north side.

From there I went to the Lemon Jeese keg party! It's for a good cause and I think the guys throwing it are fantastic. I ended up drinking cans of PBR and Modelo because the keg was a IPA and it was a little warm (amateurs). But it was nice, it was fun. I played a game of beer pong and shot gunned a beer with my boy Alex. Beer is great! Drinking is fun! Let's get drunk again NEXT Cheat Day.

Beer of the week

As the sun was setting and the party was coming to a close it was time to transition from Cheat Day into Cheat Night! I headed for an impromptu game night with the Giamichael's where I drank more Modelo, ate halves of leftover burritos from god only knows where!, and very quickly lost $5 in a game of 99. Want to know what it is? Come over and we'll take some of your money showing it to you!

Did I forget to mention...?

After that stop my friend Mike Sater and I grabbed more Miller High Lifes from the store and I ordered a late night end of Cheat Day Jet's pizza with jalapeno and pineapple with TURBO CRUST, DUH! Always Turbo Crust! And it seemed like it was a jalapeno and pineapple kind of day I reckon! Happy Summer!

It was a long wander of a cheat day where I bounced around all over the north side finding drinks and bad food to crush! It's a wonderful day of the week to be spending with friends and trying any thing and everything, especially when you've lost 7 pounds from the week before! This week is gonna be tough with Independence Day splitting it up, but I am hopeful! Maybe I'll amp up the working out! Send good vibes ya'll and let me know what you'd like to see me try NEXT Cheat Day! Take care of yourselves! Take care of each other. Eat like your life depended on it.

ELE,
Zach

Cheat Week? DO Care.

Alright ya cheatin' ass maw tuggin' butt lickin' dong SNIFFERS! I'm SORRY! Alright. I came out and said it. RIGHT OFF THE BAT TOO! Okay? None of that tired/half-assed Louis CK type apology, NAH. NO SIR. I. AM. SORRY. Alright?! Sorry to you for letting you down. I am stuck up at my original weight! For those of you who don't know it's about 263 lbs....And I wanted to be a 200 by August, WELL NOT AT THIS RATE! And I am sorry to you, my faithful reader for that. I'm also sorry to myself. Sorry Zach, hey, it's okay Zach. You're trying! You're conscious of your situation at least. You are working toward a better, healthier life and this is a commendable step...yeah-well-THAT'S NOT GOOD ENOUGH OTHER ZACH! Ehem... Here's what happened...

Loyola Taco Bell Interior

Last day-after-cheat-day the Kansas Jayhawks played the Duke Blue Devils in the Elite 8 for a spot in the Final 4 and the Jayhawks totally won! It was an awesome game too, close the whole way through. During the game I got a little drunk of Vodka Tonics. BOOM, already a bad sign. Last week I TOLD YOU I wouldn't be drinking on Non-Cheat Days and here I am, knocking back Vodka-Sodas like some middle aged woman and a BAD cheater! Anyway the intoxication of the victory mixed with the intoxication of the vodka set in motion some bad decision making on my part. I had decided that it would be a good idea to go to Taco Bell to celebrate....I KNOW. STUPID!...wanna know what I ate?
I KNEW YOU DID! You friggin' VOYEURS! I ate a Crunchwrap Supreme, A Chicken Quesadilla, a Cheesy Gordita Crunch WITH a Doritos Locos Taco, AND a Beef Quesarito OR, as I call it, the usual. Next, I let myself get talked into a "bang-bang". For those of you who don't know I'll explain. A "bang-bang" is where fat people, or people with a cheat day, will go to one restaurant sit and eat a meal and then immediately go to another restaurant and eat a whole OTHER meal. Fuckin' A right? America! Good thing I had all those vodka sodas rather than beer otherwise I'd be 360 lbs amirite? I know, I know, I'm wrong...STUPID!

"The Usual"

"Zach! Shut up and tell us where the 2nd half of this bang-bang took place!"

Raising Cane's

FINE, FUCK! I went up the street from the Loyola Campus Taco Bell to the Loyola Campus Raising Cane's Chicken Fingers. This was actually a serious treat, even on non-cheat day, as I had never been before. Cane's Chicken Fingers are truly top notch, especially for a chain. The fingers were HOT, the breading was plentiful AND crispy. The meat? Succulent and juicy. I'd go back, again and again. It was reminiscent of Lee's Fried Chicken in Richmond, VA, if anyone of you has ever had that before.

Giordano's Thin Crust

Anyway, this bang-bang was just the beginning of a BAD week. After a couple of solid days of slow-carb I hosted a meeting at my work during which my company provides free pizza and beer. I'm not going to lie, it was also a rough week at work and I cracked immediately on the beer. That, in turn, led me to crack on the pizza. I ate off of the left over Giordano's thin crust pizza for the rest of the week. Which leads me to this past Cheat Day.

Still Site

TURBO CRUST

I DID NOT pull a normal Cheat Day. Instead, I didn't eat anything all day until that TERRIBLE TERRIBLE Final Four, during which I pounded a few Steigl Gold Brau and Miller High Life's. Then we got some GOD DAMN Jet's Pizza! This is hands down the best chain pizza going right now. If you don't know the ways of Jet's Pizza and their Turbo Crust you've got to get yourself initiated. Jet's is a Detroit-Style Pizza Chain that boasts several different buttery/crispy pizza dough flavors, the most epic of which is TURBO CRUST! It's flavor and texture is unbeatable. It is soft and chewy and cheesy and delicious. Do yourself a FLAVOR and get yourself some GOD DAMN JET'S!

Braciole

Finally there was Easter Sunday. I was to be going to Easter Dinner at the Giamichael's. There would be no way I would make it out of there without devouring some mad carbs and so I allowed myself one more day before hopping back onto the Slow Carb horse. While there I drank a bunch of beers, DUH. I brought a Taco Bell Party Pack to contribute to the party and ate 2 and a half soft tacos myself. I ate cheese and crackers, fruit, delicious home-made pasta and scalloped potatoes. And then there were the meats! I had homemade meatballs, braciola, Italian sausage, and of course the Easter Sunday favorite: HAM! Finally, desserts. Now, I can't remember what I even ate. I think there was some lemon cake, some chocolate pie, and some GAUL DERN Italian cookies. My sides hurt all over again and I am struggling to breathe.

After all that I was done! I decided 100% that I absolutely had to re-set if I wanted to keep going on the Cheat Day Train. So as I write this I am two days in to clean eating and drinking. No alcohol during the week, again no carbs outside of complex carbs and yes mostly protein and veggies. It ain't easy, as I have already shown just two months into this diet, but I am also going to hop back on my bike and get some more cardio and hopefully get on a better exercise regimen to really kick this fucking thing into high gear! Thank you Liz, Alex, Nick and Brian for the inspiration to get this diet back on track! For more please visit www.zachandtony.com. Take care of yourselves. Take care of each other. And eat like your like depended on it!

ELE,
Zach Finch