Budlong Budstrong

Greetings from Cheat Town you Cheatin' SOBs! I'm BACK in Chicago! This fat sack of shit gained weight over the course of the last two Cheat "Days" because I was cheating for multiple god damn days each god damn week. I weighed back in at 250 lbs and YOU KNOW how I HATE that number. I never want to be that again GOD DAMMIT! SO, I'm back at it hard and strong THIS week.

"Hey IDIOT! Does that mean you didn't cheat very hard this weekend? Cause if SO I'm gonna stop reading RIGHT NOW!"

CRAM IT WITH WALNUTS UGLY! I Cheated just fine! Although I was back in Chi-town this Cheat Day was quite unique as I woke up on Tony Giamichael's (of Man Called Noon fame!) couch hung THE FUCK over. I awoke around 10:30AM in a daze, unsure of where I was. A dog named Danny jumped on me and tried to force me to pet him. I shook him off and slowly pried myself away from the couch. Moments later I was staring into the refrigerator using the door to help prop me up.

There wasn't much in there that was Cheat Day worthy except watermelon, but that shit hit the spot I tell you what! It definitely helped curb my initial hangover symptoms. I polished off about 5 or 6 chunks of watermelon before I had to head to my improv class at The Annoyance Theatre.

I decided to walk the 30 minutes to The Annoyance to clear my head and think of a quick place to stop and get some serious cheat food. My hungover brain struggled to remember what was between me and the theatre. But then about 15 minutes in it hit me like an alien erupting from my gut...the Wrigleyville Taco Bell was between me and the theatre. The only question I had next was: would I make it in time for breakfast?

NO. I. WOULDN'T! FUCK, oh well. You know I'm still down for Taco Bell of any kind at any time. GIMME DAT. I got a cheesy gordita crunch with a Dorito taco, cause it's that BEST alright?! How many fuggin' times do I have to say it! I also got me a cheesy bean and rice burrito and a 5 layer burrito cause I'm trying to pinch pennies MAWfckler! Then off I went to class, STILL hungover, but happy full!

Carr Valley Cheese

After class I went home and ate some delicious cheese that Liz and I brought back from Wisconsin. It was cheddar...cheddar's better. I love cheese.

Then the same Tony from before came over with a bunch of Coronas and we drank some of those before heading off to this week's JOINT OF THE WEEK: The Budlong in Lincoln Square! The Budlong is a Nashville style fried chicken joint. You know, those southern themed places that seem to be popping up all over the place?

"Yeah dingus, we KNOW, how was THIS one?!"

hey HEY! It was great! Maybe the best one. The location in Lincoln Square is chill. Tony pointed out that it has an old fashioned wooden door with a knob, it's not a sterile glass push door like most business have these days. It feels homie, like a local country spot you kind of stumble in to on a road trip through the sticks. The service was exquisite. The staff was friendly and helpful and our food was ready PRONTO.

We each ordered the tenders. You get three giant ass chicken tenders seasoned in a level of hotness to your discretion. The scale goes from "naked" (sexy) to X-Hot (SEXIER). I didn't want to ruin the rest of Cheat Day with some sort of spice related stomach issue so I stuck with the Hot. Tony and I agreed that if you ENJOY spicy but aren't necessarily the bravest of spice fans that hot is the way to go. It's not knock you on your ass hot but it will get you sweating a little bit. I felt the pressure behind my eyeballs for instance, but my mouth was never fully on fire.

The tenders also comes with a piece of Texas toast. Here's a pro-tip for you: If you are considering getting a sandwich...don't. It's more expensive and you can just wrap one of your tenders in a BIG ASSED piece of Texas toast and making allowing you to turn one tender into a taco shaped sandwich.

Liz and Al (of Liz and the Lovelies fame) were playing the Blue Jean Gala for Old Town School of Folk Music in Lincoln Square as well. They were posted up outside of a Sushi joint, called Miku Sushi, which was offering up a buffet of sushi for the event. DID I PARTAKE you say?! What THE FUCK do you think?! It's CHEAT DAY idn't it?! I had three or four pieces of sushi, a few fried spring roll type things, some beef and chicken skewers with some DELICIOUS sauce, and a Sapporo beer.

The rest of the Cheat Day consisted of drinking heavily cause good Ol'James Manno threw a small party to make some of his friends feel better. So, naturally there were a lot of drinks. I drank 6 High Life tallboys, 2 or 3 PBRs, and 3 shots of Jack...and to be honest probably even more than that...but after so many you start to get a little fuzzy on what it was you drank.

I got to hang out with an old friend I haven't seen in a while so it seemed fitting. To her it was like stepping back into college because so many of us knew each other from those days and it sounds like where she lives she doesn't get to see that many people from back in the day. It was fun...and necessary.

So, if some of you were disappointed by how much I drank last week I hope that this makes up for it. Because, what ended up happening is I crashed on James MANNO'S couch Saturday night. That's right...2 couch crashes as the bread on a Cheat Day sandwich. Needless to say I need a rest. There was a lot of taking care of each other this weekend, which is SO good. I love to see it and I am happy to help when I can for almost all of you! But let's not forget...take care of yourselves. YES take care of each other. And eat like your life depended on it!

ELE,
Zach

Cheese Day. Don't Care.

Yum a Dummy Do Cheaters! It is I Zach FARTILIUS Finch! Talkin' once again about CHEAT fuggin' DAY. I am back to sub-260 and I NEVER want to go above that ever the FUCK again! So gimme a "holla atcha boy" in the comments if you agree! OR DON'T Fuck it, what do I care. Ya'll are just here to live vicariously through a gluten and I love you for that!

I did it guys! I had a great week of Slow Carbs and I lost some poundage. I also did a lot of biking and walking on top of that. I intend on increasing my work out routine further and I will let you know how that goes next week. But I biked my DICK OFF let me tell you. And for those of you who bike, you know the exact feeling I'm talking about. And for those of you without dicks or don't bike or both I will describe it to you. Sometimes you bike SO MUCH that the narrow and HARD seat you are sitting on is CRAMMED deep into your taint and makes your junk fall asleep. Ya know, has your foot ever fallen asleep from you sitting on it? It's like that, but in your dick!

"WHERE DID YOU EAT YOU NASTY FREAK?!"

Ah jeez, my dick bit made you hungry eh? Well, I'll get right to it. I didn't make too strong of a plan for this Cheat Day as my lovely lady Liz was not to be joining me. So, we woke up and ate a rather usual breakfast: Eggs and Bacon, only this time we added CHEESE to everything. I also ate left over chips from an impromptu game night which I topped with, YOU GUESSED IT, CHEESE! Dem GOT DAMNED Henning's Wisconsin Cheese Curds at that. GOT DAMN that's good cheese.

Chooch Chat Episode 84

I then went to record an episode of my podcast, Chooch Chat, with Tony Giamichael of the Rock and Roll outfit Man Called Noon. On the way to his place I picked up an 8 pack of Guinness pints. I left only two in the Mom's Studio fridge when all was said and done. Beer is a truly yearn-able beverage on this slow carb diet. For a guy like me to limit himself to one day of beer per week is quite a feat. So I LEANED into it. I had 6 pints of Guinness, 2 Ayingers, and 2 Busch Lights while at Mom's Studios. I know, the quality really drops off there, but HEY that's 8 pretty heavy beers, all while I was at Mom's Studio doing the podcast and I was still standing and ready for more! I also ate MORE cheese there, a delicious assortment of Trader Joe's fancy cheeses. I guess we'll call this one CHEESE Day. Don't Care...

After that Tony and I went to Nick's on Wilson where our friend, Nick Taylor, was working. Nick's on Wilson is JUST a bar, no food. I'd call it a dive bar, but Tony thinks it's too nice...stupid idiot! I knew before I was gonna drink anymore I needed SOMEthing to eat. So we went into the adjacent 7-Eleven where I got a small Italian sub and 4 taquitos. FLAVORS?! 2 Jalapeno and Cream Cheese and 2 Taco and Cheese. The 7-Eleven taquito is one of my all time favorite guilty pleasure foods. I'll gladly waste some Cheat Day gut space on those bad boys.

Once in Nick's I enjoyed 3 more beers, 3 Floyd's Alpha King on tap. Delicious. Nick also made Tony and I a special shot which he called a rainbow water slide. VERY fruity. I'm pretty sure Nick just used all of the Stoli flavored vodkas for it. It was nearing the end of my Cheat Day when I left Nick's bar and I wasn't entirely satisfied with my choices. But then, I met back up with Liz and She. Changed. Everything.

Neither of us wanted to do much with our Saturday evening so we made our way to our local bodega for some snacks to nosh on while watching a movie. My choice was nachos and a burrito from a local Mexican joint, FUCK bodega snacks, those are for suckers. And as we approached the bodega we saw a bright shiny idea bulb in the form of the new local corner bar to our neighborhood: Wolcott Tap!

We went in and I CONTINUED to drink beer! I ordered 2 Half-Acre Daisycutters and a Hamms. The Hamms was only $3 on tap, not too shabby a price. While there we also made the bold decision to ORDER FUCKING FOOD. I did it! I hit up a new local spot! A Cheat Day NECESSITY, so I am glad this turn of events took place. They had a good bar menu! And, though a bit pricey, delicious food. I ordered a Cheesesteak with Fries and Liz ordered the Cubano. Their Cheesesteak and Cubanos were a bit different but delicious none the less. See they hollow out these strange delicious rolls that are nice and crispy and buttery, yum a dum dum, and then they stuff those rolls with delicious fillings, the likes of which you'd find on a cheesesteak or in a cubano. I was nervous the sandwiches would fall apart easily, but quite the contrary! They held together exquisitely. The fries, though not my usual preference were quite good and unique. I give it a solid point and pump. It's going to be great because it is super close too!

To cap it all off I got some Cherry Coke (the king of sodas) at that bodega afterwards and made some whiskey-cokes. I woke up this morning with a horrible stomach ache. I guess cheat day was a huge success. Don't forget everyone: Take care of yourselves. Take care of each other. Eat like your life depended on it.

ELE
Zach